Tag Archives: Gar Ryness

“Batting Stance Guy”

I rarely find a book that I like that’s been recommended by someone else.  Books and movies are personal in nature and everyone relates to whatever they relate to  regardless of what the other guy likes. 

So a few weeks ago when I read a book review by a fellow blogger about how hilarious the “Batting Stance Guy” was, I went to Amazon Reviews to check it out and sure enough, 15 reviews, 5 stars.    So I had very high expectations when I starting reading the book and immediately was disappointed.  I mean when someone says a book is hilarious, rolling on the floor laugh-out-loud funny, I planned to be entertained.  It took me awhile to warm up to the book, but in the end I have to admit, it was pretty darn funny.   Here’s a sampling;

  • “Can one player have too much style?  I think so.  (If there weren’t MLB rules in place) Ichiro would come to the plate in a smoking jacket and Ray-Bans.  He’d be like Hugh Hefner.  Either that or he’d be like Michael Jackson – weird Michael, not creepy Michael.  He’d wear a jewel-encrusted batting glove, swing a fluorescent bat, and moonwalk to first base.”
  • “July 7, 1991; the first time I ever sneaked onto a major league baseball field.  The A’s were out-of-town, the back gate was open, and there was no security in sight.  The terrorists really have won now that moments like this aren’t possible anymore.” 
  • “About Ivan Calderon.  Calderon is Puerto Rican.  How do you say Magnum P.I. in Spanish?”
  • An open letter to Bud Selig about Pete Rose:  “Dear Bud, What is Bud short for?  Budrich? Buddadiah?  Pete won the Rookie of the Year, was an MVP, a two-time Gold Glover, a 17-time All Star, and won three World Series rings…..  If you’re not going to reinstate him because he bet on baseball, at least reinstate his hair, because it was awesome. “
  • On Mickey Tettleton; …..”he’s not just about the game, he’s a lifestyle.  He’s tough, a catcher and a cowboy.  You just don’t mess with him…..He only eats meat, and only if it’s raw.  He only drinks motor oil…..  You don’t mess with Tettleton.  I’m actually afraid to imitate his stance.”

The Batting Stance Guy, © 2010, by George A. Ryness IV and Caleb Dewart, Published by Simon and Schuster, Inc.  

If  you like baseball, you’re gonna like this book!  No, really!  Trust me ♥

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